Here’s the apocalyptic story (CBS2 Chicago)
And here is the actual page on the City of Chicago website.
Let me paraphrase:
- You still owe your real-estate taxes and parking tickets, even if your house and car are burnt toast
- If you live on the South Side or West Side, remember: you are still at risk of drive-by shootings
- If you live near a church with a “nuclear-free zone” sign, you may ignore all warnings. You are safe and smug.
- Also, please note that even a nuclear blast cannot crack the shell of your moral superiority
- Please replace your old City of Chicago flag with the newly-redesigned one below