Police have imposed a brown-out on news about the crime

Muggers wielding pepper spray steal man’s laxatives in SF.

That’s the actual headline in SF Gate. They report

A pair of women attacked a 64-year-old man with pepper spray Thursday night near the Powell Street BART Station in San Francisco and stole a bag — which contained the victim’s laxatives, police said.

Comment: “Captain, one of them is running. I think we can trail them.”

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